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After all, who better to offer insight into why relationships fail?"There were so many little tidbits, like how to fight fairly and productively," he says, but his favorite piece of advice came from an interviewee who went by the pseudonym "Jim." He said: There is something absolutely divine -- I mean, literally, the breath of God -- in the ability to put someone else in your heart, to think of them first.
"Ask her what her favorite movie is, and why," she suggests. Ask her what she'd like to be remembered for." This small change "infuses relationships with new life," she says.Stay on your toes "In my study, when couples said they were in a relationship rut or felt bored, they were less happy over time," says Orbuch. "The changes can be small, but they have to upset the routine enough to make him or her sit up and take notice." Similarly, anthropologist Helen Fisher suggests that couples "keep doing novel things together," she says."Novelty drives up the dopamine system in the brain and can help to sustain feelings of romantic love." Marriage is like a credit card Helen Fisher, author of "Why Him? : How to Find and Keep Lasting Love," recommends sustaining "your 'positive illusions'" about your significant other.Sex is awesome; nevertheless, not all sex is equally awesome.One of the fabulous things about marrying your soul mate is experiencing an unique connection and level of familiarity.