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It's funny how life puts you in the right place at the right time.We have encouraged many of our friends to attend the Lock and Key Events and one of our best friends is still dating a woman he met at the Oxygen Lounge last Fall.Right off the bat, there were a few ideas I had formed about Tinder.The informality of it, the swiping through real live human beings like objects.Bottom line is, the spiral had begun, and once I begin a spiral, there's no stopping it.Other than, like, metaphorical gravity, I guess, but let's say in this metaphor there is no gravity. It was a cold, snowy December evening on the mean streets of Long Island.
According to research by Michael Rosenfeld from Stanford University and Reuben Thomas from City College of New York, in the early 1990s, less than 1 percent of the population met partners through printed personal advertisements or other commercial intermediaries.Those percentages are likely even larger today, the authors write. Through the 1980s and into the 1990s, a stigma was associated with personal advertisements that initially extended to online dating. The authors caution that matching sites' emphasis on finding a perfect match, or soulmate, may encourage an unrealistic and destructive approach to relationships.But today, "online dating has entered the mainstream, and it is fast shedding any lingering social stigma," the authors write. "People with strong beliefs in romantic destiny (sometimes called soulmate beliefs) that a relationship between two people either is or is not 'meant to be' are especially likely to exit a romantic relationship when problems arise and to become vengeful in response to partner aggression when they feel insecure in the relationship," the authors write. Despite claims of using a "science-based" approach with sophisticated algorithm-based matching, the authors found "no published, peer-reviewed papers or Internet postings, for that matter that explained in sufficient detail the criteria used by dating sites for matching or for selecting which profiles a user gets to peruse." Instead, research touted by online sites is conducted in-house with study methods and data collection treated as proprietary secrets, and, therefore, not verifiable by outside parties."Online dating is definitely a new and much needed twist on relationships," says Harry Reis, one of the five co-authors of the study and professor of psychology at the University of Rochester.Behavioral economics has shown that the dating market for singles in Western society is grossly inefficient, especially once individuals exit high school or college, he explains.
' " Along with Reis, other co-authors include Eli Finkel, associate professor of social psychology at Northwestern University and lead author on the paper; Paul Eastwick, assistant professor of psychology at Texas A&M University; Benjamin Karney, professor of psychology at the University of California at Los Angeles; and Susan Sprecher, professor of sociology and psychology at Illinois State University.