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Maybe he’ll have a better sense in a few months whether he’s committed enough to you and a future together to take on parenting a baby again. But in six months you’re going to be 29 or close to it and what happens if he’s decided then that he needs more time?
Or that, as much as he loves you, he simply doesn’t have room in his life and heart for a baby?
No: “Eh, maybe I might consider it.” No: “Well, let’s keep dating a little longer and see how I feel about things in six months.” No. If you truly want children, and you want to have them with a partner, then you are too old to be emotionally investing in anyone who isn’t completely open to the idea of having kids with you.
Let’s say your boyfriend, who is “touched” that you’d consider having kids with a man as old as he, asks you to wait six more months to see how serious the relationship is then.
I get a variation of this letter every month or so and keep answering it publicly so that all the women — or men — in your situation will recognize themselves and MOA if there isn’t an absolute agreement on kids. It means your boyfriend has to be 100%, absolutely committed to the idea of having children with you.
You still need to find someone to fall in love with. And then you have to get pregnant and have it stick.
If you’re lucky, it happens right away, but the older you get, the harder it is to get pregnant and successfully carry a healthy baby to term.
What if you break up with your boyfriend when you’re 29, take a year to get over him, and then don’t meet anyone you really click with until you’re, like, 32 or 33?
And then you want to date him for a couple years before you have kids, so then you’re close to 35.